Help Me Get My Ex Back
By Ask Rob! The Advice General

If she breaks up with you and you've done all you can to prove yourself, it's time to take a break from heartache and move on. Maybe being on your own will bring her back to you once she sees what she's missing.

Dear Rob,
I have been broken up with my last girlfriend for a few months.

I tried so many things to get her back and even though I know I proved it she decided to listen to rumors that were started after our breakup.

Really bad ones of that, the last time I tried I wrote a poem that was breathtaking and not kidding about it then left a simple green rose for her with it and also a letter explaining my side of the rumors but when opened it my friend gave it to her but thought it was from him first and appeared that she loved it and then noticed it was my writing in the poem and didn't like it any more.

Well I haven't given up on her even though she is now dating a pill popper who is horrible for her, he just uses her and I heard when he feels that she is getting too close that he will dump her and that's one of his friends who told me.

Well I haven't quit on her because anytime I pass by her at work she still gives me the same look as when we laid next to each other at night.

And not just me either any one who watches her when I pass by see it too.

What can I do to start talking to her again and have her really start thinking of me in dating form again.

She let the rumors make her think I continually try to find out everything about everything she does. Can you help me?
Jeff

Hi Jeff,
The most important thing here is to give her space.

It sounds to me that you’ve been chasing after her relentlessly since your breakup.

Leave her be for a while… stop spying on her, walking by her, asking friends about her.

This is way too clingy and these wussy behaviors that have to stop.

So, my advice to you is to back away… give her space… stop with the notes and the information searches… leave her be for a couple of months.

Give her time to miss you, them she may come to realize that you two belong together.

Two months from today you can send her (email or regular mail) a love letter that is like this:

“Dear XXX,
I am angry, with myself for still missing you.
I am fearful that we won’t be together again.
I am scared to live my life without you.
I am happy that you are able to be your own person.
I am hopeful that you will love me again.
Love, me.”

Remember this love letter to get your girl back should be sent to her when she starts missing you, and not a moment before… 60 days, two months. Wait. Don’t even be concerned if she starts to date someone else… she’s just healing. She’s rebounding.

Time will help her to miss you but you have to let her live her single life (or dating life) for the next two months without butting in. No information snooping from her family or your friends.

Do nothing for 60 days and you just might win her back. Do anything else and the end will be very real for your chances of getting her back.
Best wishes,
Rob.

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